Tip 1

 compliments that seriously insult you

sarcastic compliments 

 A "compliment" becomes offensive if you express surprise at someone's "excellent" characteristic or conduct, or support racial or gender stereotypes. Learn the questions never appropriate to ask. 

You praise someone for being late, but it could come across as arrogant. From The Inside Out Project's creator and certified social worker Laura MacLeod argues that by bringing up their habit of being late you're merely drawing attention to it.

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Hey, you're early! 

Wyatt Fisher, PhD, is a certified psychologist in Colorado. People love receiving praises on their new appearance, but run the risk of pointing out that they looked worse before. There's no need to expound; just keep it to the praise, he says.

"I'm so impressed with how effectively you're managing the kids!" 

Praising your spouse for the way they parent in general terms may give the impression that you are shocked that they are managing at all. It's acceptable to praise individual actions, such as "The was fantastic how you handled.

Yellow Star
Yellow Star

Caleb Backe is a health and wellness specialist with Maple Holistics. Sometimes people don't feel like they can handle their issues or that they want to be "strong," he says. 

"You are such a resilient individual!" 

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"You're very articulate for a Black person, I must say" and "For a mom, you're in such excellent shape" are microaggressions. Irina Baechle says the phrase can be used as a cover for racism, sexism or other negative attitudes. 

someone from a culture that prioritises collective or family success over individual achievement, this may feel humiliating and demeaning. Learn the phrases you ought to avoid using at work.

Making comments on someone's appearance when you don't have a deep personal relationship with them can make them feel uncomfortable or even harassed. 

"You're incredibly beautiful!"

According to McManus, accomplishments might make them feel more like a paycheck than a person. A compliment might also make them assume that's what you appreciate in them. 

"Honey, I'm so happy for you that you got a raise this year!"